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MARILYN
DENIS
stepping up and into life
Interviewed By Barbara Goodman
Editor of Canadian Health & Lifestyle
Not only does she bring the best out in herself, her vision and purpose is to be a catalyst to bring out the best in others for others. From the famous people she interviews to her audience.
Marilyn Denis shares her extraordinary talent daily, as she brings life, home, health and beauty tips to her nationally syndicated talk show CityLine. And for those who don’t know she begins her day as co-host of the “Roger, Rick and Marilyn Morning Show” heard on CHUM FM in Toronto. Here she shares her wit and candor with early morning listeners as they make their way to work.
This well-known single Mom of a teenage son, Marilyn Denis shares her life, her loves and how she has stepped up into life. |
H&L One of the things that awes me about you is how relaxed and real you are inter-viewing high profile people. I saw you interview Sting.
Marilyn I always get nervous at the beginning of anything that’s out of my environment of CityLine or CHUM. It’s good because it keeps me up, excited and sharper for the in-terview.
With a legend like Sting I make sure I’m well researched so that I feel more comfortable, this in turn makes them feel comfortable. But then you look into Sting’s eyes and you just want to take your clothes off. That’s why I asked him about the Tantric sex. It got quite a laugh and made everyone comfortable, including him.
Sting was so generous. That’s the key. People who’ve been around a long time, and he’s been around a long time, are very generous. They know how important the media is to them. They know they want to give a sense of who they really are, rather then what they are up on stage.
My thing is to find out who these people are. With Lionel Ritchie I asked, “Why do you think you made it?” He stopped for a couple of seconds, then said, “I don’t know. I have to think about that. I don’t know!”
I would say nine times out of ten it’s hard work, talent and time.
H&L So back at ya’.
Marilyn Hard work, talent and timing. Talent being the minimum for me.
H&L But, Marilyn you obviously have talent, it’s present daily.
Marilyn I really value the people on MuchMoreMusic Live. They have a specific tal-ent.When I was kid I thought: What am I good at? I tried drawing, singing, and playing a violin, it just wasn’t happening. One sister was a cellist, the other a pianist, my late sister was a violinist and my Dad won a lot of awards as a pianist when he was a kid. I was disturbed that I was the only one who didn’t get it even though I had just as many lessons and support. But I kept believing there’s got to be something.
There are people who have a great general knowledge. I don’t have great general knowledge but I know a little bit about many things. I absorb information. I find it as in-teresting as other people would. I think I’m a good representation of the audience. I ask the questions the audience wants answered, even the most obvious. Because I know there’s someone out there that wants, or needs to know. I’m like a conductor. I’m able to get the best out of these people for the majority of us to appreciate.
H&L When did you realize you had this gift?
Marilyn Probably 5 years into the show.
H&L Really? CityLine or the CHUM Morning Show?
Marilyn CityLine. I don’t conduct at CHUM. I’m a co-host. There can only be one anchor and that’s Roger Ashby. He’s a great anchor. Although the morning show is a team effort there still has to be one leader and that’s Roger. I’m a reactor to what he says. I don’t prep at all. I don’t know what he’s going to say. That way, I react the way the audience would. We found that worked best.
H&L Is this your natural talent?
Marilyn I think I’m a good listener. Maybe I developed it sitting at the dinner table Mom, Dad and four girls. Being the third child there wasn’t a lot of time for me. Maureen hogged the most time. Miriam had to say something, the baby couldn’t speak, and I sat there, listened and brought it all in.
I also really, really like people. (I could feel her sincerity). Whether they’re famous, have a special talent, or an idea I like to find the process that got them to their place. That’s interesting to me!
Like with Donald Trump I want to talk to Donald Trump about when he was a kid and how he got here. I don’t care about now, I already know now.
H&L Looking back was there a pivotal moment in your life that led you to where you are today?
Marilyn Hmmm. Grade 11 sitting in the audience of the high school musical Brigadoon. I sat there thinking: What am I doing sitting here? This is ridiculous. I’m in the Marching Band, a pompom person. I choreograph. I’m in every talent show pantomiming and making people laugh.
By the way, this was a girl with low self-esteem who was very, very quiet, hard to believe now. I went through grade 7 to 10 with no chest. I would pile my books up to my chin put my head down and walk through the halls. I would sit at the very back of the room or the very front of the room, so nobody could see me. I wanted to be left alone.
In my other life I was singing into doorknobs or using the end of a jump rope as a mi-crophone, singing into the trees my audience. My Mom said these were the two different Marilyns. Then when talent shows came up I would gather people and direct them, “You’re going to do this; you’re going to pretend playing the piano; and you’re going to sing.”
But I remember it was the Brigadoon thing. I sat there thinking, “I could do that. (Not better than them). You could do that, what’s wrong with you?” So the next year I auditioned for Hello Dolly and I got the funny role. The Minnie Faye role not on stage long, gets the laugh and out. I was happy!
H&L A life changing moment.
Marilyn A life changing moment for me and my folks. They went, “Holy crow!” My Dad came up to me stunned, almost weeping, “I didn’t know.”
H&L You’re up at 3:30 in the morning, have two high profile jobs, a single mother of a 16 year old boy what keeps you going?
Marilyn I don’t ever want to be accused of being lazy. And because I don’t think I do any one thing really well, I don’t want people to notice. So I’m a moving target I just keep movin’. But, when I do something I want to do it to the best of my ability.
H&L Grew up in Pittsburgh, a Bachelor of Science, and then radio?
Marilyn I was born in Edmonton, Alberta. We moved to Pittsburgh when I was young and lived there until I was 18.
A Bachelor of Science, then I majored in Radio and TV at the University of Idaho, with a minor in Advertising and a minor, minor in Anthropology.
The University of Idaho was perfect. There was a student run radio station; a PBS as-sociated television station; an AM and FM station; and a University run station. I was on the radio my third day on campus. And in one semester I was on all of them simultaneously a bit of everything, kind of like now.
H&L Are there two Marilyns today? The friendly down to earth, out there Marilyn we see, then another Marilyn hiding in there?
Marilyn A diva! (a lot of laughter you know she’s kidding). Not! But there is a frustrated Marilyn. Frustrated because things don’t move as fast as I’d like them to, but I think that’s with any business.
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H&L What do you really, really love? Other than your son or family.
Marilyn That’s not fair. (She pouts).
I love to work. I don’t know if I’ll ever retire. I don’t know if I’ll be doing this (CityLine) be-cause they’ll kick me off.
Thank goodness Roger and I have the same feeling about work. They’ll have to put me out to pasture or something, or, I’ll work at WalMart. (Another hearty laugh).
H&L What is in Marilyn’s future?
Marilyn I don’t know. Not that I don’t want something. I don’t know. I look forward to the day when I meet a great guy I feel it in my bones. I’m going to travel and celebrate my son’s achievements with him. That’s what I see in my future.
H&L If you had a magic wand what would you create?
Marilyn (a huge laugh) A very nice man! Around my age that’s got good stuff going for him. I would be his partner but he’d have his own life, doing his own thing, independent.
H&L Valerie Gibson from the Toronto Sun interviewed you on being an independent, successful woman and whether you think it scares men away.
Marilyn It couldn’t have been a bigger picture of me: “Hey I’m single!” and no phone call. (We’re all laughing.) No, no! I actually got a phone call from a 28-year-old sous chef. “You’re so sweet but I can’t go there,” I told him.
A couple of my great, married guy friends said independence is part of it. Guys my age don’t necessarily want younger women. They want women that are together. The problem is that these guys are busy doing their thing, like I’m busy doing my thing. They probably have little kids and careers. There’s really not a great place to meet them. It’s really important for the married friends to connect people together. I think that’s where it has to happen.
The reason I’m not going out isn’t because I’m not meeting anyone it’s because I’m not encouraging it right now. I’m not quite ready yet. I have friends that say ‘I know someone’ so when I’m ready I’ll do it.
H&L Is there anything you would change in your life, past, present?
Marilyn I don’t think anything. Even though some things weren’t pretty I learned a lot. Certainly if I’d hurt anybody along the way, and I’d apologise to my mother for things that I said or did in high school that kind of thing. But other than that I wish my sister Miriam was still alive. She died of breast cancer at 38.
After Miriam died I thought, “Why did she have to go through this? Why did my parents have to go through that?” That’s not normal. Also, “What am I taking from it?” She died after seven years of dealing with breast cancer her son in grade one, mine 2 months old. I was supposed to go through stuff with her.
Then I became conscious that I had learned to have empathy and compassion for those who had cancer and their families. That I would have a perspective and know how to speak with everyone involved.
Since that time I’ve had a lot of friends that have been diagnosed with breast cancer. I understand that they get extremely bitchy because they’re ticked off they got it; the medication makes them agitated; and who knows what else is going on. I remember Miriam not being well after chemo and radiation, it would be a bad week. But I knew I’d get her back after that.
The whole experience made me much more compassionate.
H&L A lovely attribute to develop.
Marilyn I also understand how it affects the family dynamic and changes it. Miriam was the leader of the four sisters and she was great. That changed, my sister Maureen stepped up. She’s always been very together and my little sister is strong too.
So if I could change anything I really wish that my sister was still alive.
H&L That compassion shows everyday with your guests and audience. But what does Marilyn do for Marilyn?
Marilyn I work out four times a week with a personal trainer and have been for a long time now. I have an abundance of great friends, not in quantity but the ones I have are full of so much goodness. They feed me different things at different times. A lot of them are not even in the industry, mothers I met at T-ball.
I absolutely have facials. I get my nails done every week because I point at things. I make sure to do things that take care of me and make me feel good.
H&L What inspired you to exercise regularily?
Marilyn A couple of years ago I was busy, I wasn’t eating properly and I wasn’t fitting into my nice CityLine clothes. I was mad. So I said, “Okay, you’re having the egg whites; you’re having a powershake; you’re going to have vegetables and meat at lunch, this is what you’re going to do. Once you lose that weight then on the weekends you can celebrate it.” I lost about 30 lbs.
You have to have some freedom, but like a kid, you’ve got to have boundaries. I like my junk food, but it’s about controlling myself.
H&L Anything else that’s important?
Marilyn Yes, I try to drink 2 litres of water a day. And now I’m into green tea. I may have 11/2 cups of coffee a day, but then move into green tea, that helps keep the weight off.
H&L Marilyn, you’re an example of a woman who really steps up into life in all you do. What motivates you and what would you like to say to other women to motivate them?
Marilyn Life is really, really short and time goes faster as you get older. No one can make you happy except you. If something’s not right in your life change it. You can be in denial and you can bargain to make it better. But after you bargain if it doesn’t get better you have to move on. It may not necessarily be marriage; it may be your job. Whatever it is it can physically kill you.
If you’re not happy with something you may need to see somebody about it. But only you can change it. A new pair of shoes ain’t going to solve it, it may help a little, but it’s not going to solve it.
It’s also about changing the landscape of your life. Don’t be stagnant, change it up a little, you’d be surprised what can happen.
What are you going to do at 30-35, 35-40? Here I am saying this and I don’t know what I’m going to do after my contracts are done. But I’m thinking about it, it’s in the back of my mind, people are asking about it. I’m not sure but at least I’m open to opportunities. You don’t have to be stuck - you don’t. And nobody can unstick you - you have to unstick yourself. H&L
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